Thursday, July 21, 2011

My history steeped in arcana

Recently I posted about my lack of direct experience with practicing magic. An old friend read that post and reminded me of something I had not discussed or thought about for years. When I share this with you, I suspect, you may disbelieve that  I had forgotten about it. Well... You may disbelieve all of it. My friend reminded me of the things I told him when we were kids. Perhaps it is some part of me I chose not to remember.

When I was young, very young, like around three or four, my mother became involved in the occult. We have talked about it a few times but only twice in depth. She was fully immersed and associated with people she is probably glad she cannot remember due to a stroke. I recall some of what she told me and I will try to relate it here.

At one time she thought she was possessed by demons. She believed this due to her upbringing and religious background. Our family Pastor told her he had exorcised the demons and she believed it for many years. 
However, when she related the story to me, she no longer believed she had demons in her. She told me the role she had as the Seeress for the group or coven was just her natural talent as handed down to her by her mother and every maternal relative as far back as she knew. 

The ladies she referred to were all Native Americans. She said that our family history dealt with the (her words here not mine) Shamanistic and Healing arts for their tribes. As far back as her mother and grandmother could recall, all of the women in the family had taken on such roles to different degrees.
As a young boy I was enthralled and shocked. I could not believe my mom was a real witch who new about demons and spells and all manner of stuff that is creepy and weird. I came pre-wired with a love for the darker side of reality.
I clearly remember sitting at our big round kitchen table as my mother told me these things. I fingered at a dark brown crescent burn in the finish. I stared at it as she told me about seeing spirits as a child and how the spirits were not always kind. She told me about ghosts and souls too. I was like a sponge. I absorbed every word. I then received ridicule from my classmates as I regurgitated the stories on the bus and playground. By Jr. High I had learned to keep my mouth shut about those things (along with aliens, scary books, black and white horror movies and art).

Having written this on the blog it seems weird... Sort of like going back to the small town where I grew up. I know I know it but I am seeing it through new eyes and with a wealth of experience filtering it. How about you? Anything come bubbling to the surface for you?

Until next time.... READ!


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